Cooler than You: Stupid Things I Say and Do

More than a year ago I made an entry under my pen name about a cousin of mine.  The short end of him is that he makes a career out of cutting me down, and those around him.  He consistently put down my education, my writing, and everything else.  When I got published in an anthology series in 2006 he said "Who's really going to read it?"  Needless to say, my friendship with him wasn't the most healthy one.  In May 2009 he blew up at me on Yahoo Messenger, and I blocked him from my accounts.*  He made some comment that I use my Lupus and my brother's death as an excuse for my life.  He also made reference to my sister, and I at the time none of us knew where she was.  My sister will always be a touchy subject with me, and she knows this.  She came back in October, and I never bothered to tell him.  Yea.  This is also the person that when Lupus issues arose he blew up at me during a surprise visit, and he wasn't around for the infamou...

In lieu of something bonafide, I've got this.  Found it in my inbox.  Enjoy. (And you might want to read, there's news.  There's news.) 1. What time did you get up this morning? 4am, when I woke up with a taste for whiskey.  No, I did not drink any as that be would alchoholic behavior.  2. How do you like your steak? Beef makes me sad, as I do not process the proteins.  So, the correct question is how do you like your veggie burger? Answer: cooked. 3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? I went and saw _West Side Story_ in the park last week. 4. What is your favorite TV show? Criminal Minds and Rissoli and Isles 5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Well, now that I am back in NYC I am pretty content.  Though, I still have Boston and Istanbul on the list of the ten year plan. 6. What did you have for breakfast? A Marlboro Ultra Light and Cranberry juice (unsweetened).  Yes, the Lupus patient smo...

Okay, so I'm having moments where I am beginning to sound like one of those Red Sox fans pre-2003 (I shudder) or a current Cubbie fan (even more shudders).  But, maybe this is the year will be the year.  _The View_ has had two segments on Lupus inside of a month, and now New York State is once again pushing for Lupus education.  New York does have a disproportionate amount of Lupus pateints, but education leads to other things.  It leads to research.  It leads to finding causes and cures.  It leads to people like me having more than hope. Snoop Dog's daughter Corey was diagnosed with Lupus at five, and she's ten now.  She's the daughter of someone famous.  Perhaps that will help.  As I listen to the episode from 6 August   I listen to her symptoms and think I know those feelings.  Sure, it's nice to have connections in life, but connections like this just blow.  They blow monkey's balls to be exact.  There is some ne...

If I haven't said it recently, I should say it now.  I am keenly aware of people worse off than me.  Like today, the Turkish man with one leg who hobbled down the road.  He said "Merhaba" to me, and I responded in kind.  That led to the question of I am Turkish (as we know, I am not), and that is how I know he is Turkish.  I do not know how he lost his leg, but I have both of mine.  So, I could be worse.  This conversation occurred shortly after I proofed a PTSD statement for my Dad.  Here, I should say that I originally intended on posting this blog under my pen name--as if to keep it buried within the folds of my life--but I don't like mixing the Lupus talk in with my outright dirty talk over there.  After spending an hour or so reworking his words, correcting verbs, and making the story flow I clearly felt like I needed a drink.   I won't tell you the details of what I revised, or the details of what he has told me over the yea...

Apparently there are rules to city driving that I never knew about.  Forget the fact that I've been in these parts for almost ten years, minus about eighteen months or so when I was in Dixie hell. 1. Yell Douchebag at people crossing the street.  I do that on occasion.  Okay, I do that whenever some fucktard moron stops IN THE MIDDLE of the crosswalk to look around like an idiot who has never seen electric light.  "It's so pretty.  It's so pretty.  Let's take a picture."  My boot up your ass people.      2. Whenever unloading groceries, furniture, children, the dog, or something else you should park in the middle of the sidewalk even though there are ample parking spots on the street. 3. On a one way street go in reverse so that technically you are not going the wrong direction.  You know, since you are facing the correct direction so just because your car in going the wrong way that can't be a problem. 4. When picking up so...

Yesterday I went Rockaway Beach, which is accessible via subway (for those not in the know).  Yes, folks NYC has its very own beaches.  The subway and bus out there were pretty uneventful, unless you count the fact that the Woodside stop always smells like urine. Walking off the boardwalk and onto the sandy shores I relished the feel of soft, sugary sand between my toes.  I always do.  I lathered up on the sunscreen before I left the house.  I lathered up there.  I sprawled out on my beach blanket, I ate my Turkey sandwich, and then I did what I do best.  I delved into the water, as I'm not much on just lounging on the beach all day.  Rockaway is known for its undertows and waves.  The undertow wasn't an issue yesterday, and the waves were delish. The ocean has always defined me, and the sights of machines to fight its fronts excite me.  The long plants, steep steps, and the unpredictability make me feel free and alive.  ...

In about a month I celebrate my eighteen year anniversary.  What's that, say you? Clearly, no for marriage . . . that would have put me hitched at sixteen.  Since I am still flying single and solo I am certainly not hitched.  For sobriety? Um, really? I like whiskey.  Jack, to be exact.  Never Beam as it always makes me hurl; remembered that the last trip to N'Orleans too late.  Jameson on occasion, usually in a rare sexy, lonesome,and solitary kind of mood.  Maker's only in a pinch, on account of a weekend in college.  Evan Williams never, as I think it tastes like rot-gut ass.  Okay, okay enough with the whiskey diatribe.  I celebrate eighteen years of having been diagnosed Lupus; though I doubt you really call this plight a celebration.  More so, notice I said "having been diagnosed."  Yea, Lupus always manifests before diagnosis.  In my case, I was thirteen and contracted Lymes Disease, did a stint in the hospital, saw...