Tin Foil Hats
Perhaps it is a pull of the moon, the extensive rain, or just luck itself but I've got a disproportionate amount of friends wearing tin foil hats as of late. I mean, their local grocery runs out of white bread and it turns into a conspiracy to make them fatter and starve them out. The aforementioned rain makes the wifi slow, it must be government spies looking in to see what they are buying online. And then, while using an iPhone, proclaiming that we are all being controlled by machines. Yeah, there's a relative tin foil hat parade happening around me. I look to my left. I look to my right. I've got a match people. Late last week I thought that, perhaps, I was at the apex of it when some ballsy assed mother fucker blew on my shoulder blades. Why yes, while on the seven train and sporting a sundress on a 90+ degree day, I clearly needed a fucking burka. I know . . . I know . . . I totally asked for it. That being said, I came up with ...